Picture this: you are meeting someone, you give your hand to greet him, your hand is shaking, you are sweating, and your body language looks awkward and in the middle of this, that person just made an impression of you, either a positive or a negative impression. Research shows that it doesn’t even take a minute for that person to analyze your body language, your gestures, how you speak and also your overall appearance. This is because our brain is programmed to create a quick conclusion with very little information, we all do it and we don’t even realize we are doing it.
But why? every day we receive millions of stimuli and we have very little time to process all the information we receive, because of this we find ourselves making decisions very fast and we do this using our unconscious mind.
According to Freud, the conscious was the center of perception, whereas the unconscious was the storehouse of memories, desires, and needs. You’re past thoughts and memories are deleted from your conscious and then they get stored in your unconscious and they can affect our thought and feelings towards another person and influence our decision making.
So what happens in every interaction between two people?
- Eye contact.
- A smile or no smile between the two individuals.
- You instantly start analyzing their mood, or how they feel at that specific moment and that person does the same with you!
- You both say hello to each other. You either shake hands or give each other a hug depending on the person you are talking to.
- All of this happens in less than 20 seconds! And after this, you have already made an initial judgment which will be the starting point for any conversation.
How can we make sure we are making a good first impression?
-Careful with your face! Make sure you look friendly, smile and make eye contact.
-Watch your voice, I’m sure you have heard the saying “it’s not what you say but how you say it”, use a clear, pleasant tone of voice.
-Have a positive attitude and have manners. Even you if you are having a terrible day.
-Make sure you give a proper greeting (shake hands, hug, kiss, bow) this all depends on the situation and the person you are greeting.
-If you’re nervous, don’t show it, give a confident vibe, even if you are very stressed, fake it until you make it!
-Be aware of your body language (posture, gestures, hands, face)
-Listen! Listening is not just hearing what the other person is saying, listening is a conscious choice that requires concentration.
“You never get a second chance to make a fist impression” – Andrew Grant
